What Stella Young's Incredible Ted Talk Got Right about disability (2024)

1. The exceptionalization of the disabled in our world-From the very beginning, Stella Young explainshow quick able bodied people are tosensationalizedisability. To just deem it something that automatically makes a person “special,”othersthat person,regardlessof said person’s personality traits, talents, upbringing, manners, or specific privileges. Let me interject here and state that this is accurate even (especially) when they don’t know her/him closely, what she/he has been through, or the daily inconveniences brought on by the specific disability. Alas, I digress. Back to Stella’s point. Someone in her small town felt compelled to nominate her for an award- in spite of the fact that she lived, as she describes so beautifully, “a low key kind of upbringing…It was all very normal.” She goes on to say how the activities she did as a teenager were nothing out of the ordinary for her age group, even,and this is crucial-evenwithher disability. Stella was living her life as any fortunate teen should be able to do. And her community wanted to award her for it. This is one of the most maddening aspects of life as a disabled person- the fact that in simply having a disability,livingwith it, we are automatically “special.” This really, truly, makes my skin crawl. Ihatethe word special. I’ll elaborate later on how Stella equates this aggrandization with pity. On to point number two.

2. Defining (and dismissing) inspiration p*rn for what it really is- dehumanization: Next, she presents examples of how disabled people are labeled as caricatures whosesole purposeis to serve,strictly from the abled person’s viewpoint, as nothing more than objects.Objectsof inspiration. This is done rather indirectly so that an able-bodied person can supposedly feelmotivated- can feel better about herself/himself becauseTHEY ARE NOT THAT CRIPPLED PERSON.Because the worst thing you could possibly be is physically disabled, [or disabled in any way] right? Our existences must be so awful, sohard, so terrible, right? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Excuse me while I hiss and growl like an angry cat. Perhaps I’m being melodramatic. But this is what happens. We are recognized, merely praised, or even just sought outbecausewe’re physically disabled. Moreover, for me personally, the issue goes deeper. A more profound truth about ableism is that those who perpetuate this mythlegitimately have no idea(I mean it- they really have no clue) what they are talking about. Those that are so ready, and who feel so compelled, to put us on a pedestal are the ones who are the most ignorant. The most uneducated about what disability is really like and what it means to live with it.The most un-self aware of humans.The ones who honestly just need to shut their mouths and listen up.

3. Speaking truth to societal ableism as a system: Intertwining incidences from not only her own life, but from the lives of other disabled humans,Stella sums up one of our harshest truths- Able bodied people, due to societal structure and how our population inherently values able bodied privilege- chooses, whether consciously or not, to automatically group us all together, tootherus, so that we can be no more than athingthat makes them feel better about themselves. We live in a world where disability is inherently bad, inherentlynegative. Our majority of able-bodied leaders, whether it’s through entertainment, news, media coverage, or even social media, perpetuate misleading incorrect information when they casually allow this. When they pass our stories or our journeys off as “heartwarming”. Excuse me. I just need to scream. Thislie, sold and, I hasten to add, infuriatinglyacceptedby the public, is our largest barrier. It is a barrier to greater independence, to personal agency over the choices we make, and finally a barrier over the autonomy of our own lives.

4. Okay, at this point you’re probably asking yourself,“Well, what does happen when you actually are that person?”What I love so much about Stella’s approach in particular is that it gives the disabled, who alldeserveto have a voice, an entirely authentic one. To stand before an audience (the world) and explain how life actually plays out for us, with these damaging tropes, stereotypes, and narratives in a way that is as funny, thoughtful, and biting as it is wholly TRUE. Mind you, she also refuses to give in to the ever so popular “victim mindset.” Nor does she give credence to the overused narrative “me against the world” trope [which, by the way, able-bodied people buy into and love, because they profit from it- please GoogleMe Before You]. Rather, by speaking truth to her own power and abilities, she turns the lie of how society views disability on its head. Far too often, what I find most frustrating about speaking on disability, is that we aren’t given our own platforms to speak with our voices. Sure, we’ve come a long way, thanks to modernization, technology, the internet, etc.But what Stella speaks to is thatoften these platforms ignore the very factors we’re trying to overcome in the first place.I felt such pure relief melt through my body when she said, “The things that we’re overcoming are not the things that you think they are….We’re more disabled by the society we live in, rather than by our bodies and our diagnoses.” As she shed light on this underused model, Stella therefore relieved me of any inkling that I was ever a problem or a burden. I saw then, so clearly, any time that my disability had, as I’d called it, “held me back,” it was actually never that much of a true issue. It is our world that’s the problem. It is our world that is not equipped to deal with our unique mobility. It is our world that unknowingly put up barriers that we must hurtle through and then knock down. And still, they want to congratulate us for existing.

5. Introducing the notion of using one’s body to the best of it’s capacity-An aspect thatany disabled personcan relate to is the ridiculousness of glorifying disabled people for going about their daily lives. “They’re not doing anythingout of the ordinary.” Stella says this with such perfect bluntness. Consider this. Why is it that our society puts the disabled up on a pedestal? Maybe it is lack of understanding the real barriers we face. Maybe it is simply a lack of exposure, whether in social situations or familial systems. Maybe a lot of it is actually born out of fear. Very tangible, real fear. Fear of the unknown. It’s most likely a combination of all factors. However, I don’t believe mere human ignorance is problem enough. The reason why I appreciate Stella’s wording about using our bodiesto the best of our capacitiesis that, in a roundabout way, it lifts back the veil of ridiculousness our society hides under to avoid valuing disabled people’sactual, tangible, genuine, WORTHY achievements.Can I drop the mic yet?

6. Watering down real achievement through enforcing low expectations: One of the pieces of inspiration p*rn I and Stella despise most explicitly is the tired, overused notion that “The only disability in life is a bad attitude.” But here’s the deal- While I am not one to shy away from having positive attitude about life (in fact, I believe that it and ahealthyrelationship with optimism both have potential) I reject the [very harmful] idea that attitude is everything. The vastness, depth, and ripple effects of my every-day problems due to physical disability & mobility issues are all distinct, all very real. It is tangible, legitimately felt and seen by me, by my loved ones, by my friends & peers- and no amount of me just grinning my way through it [granted, with or without actively working to shift the system] is going to change that. The challenges, frustrations, preconceived notions, annoyances, and, frankly, just the ongoing exhaustion of living in a world that isn’t built for disabled persons is not something to just brush aside. To just push through. A plucky attitude and can-do spirit may look cute, but no change is activated through those factors alone. Notice, too, that I don’t say anything here about us being warriors. Because we aren’t. We’re just human. We’re flawed, we have shortcomings, foilables, and annoying quirks. We, like all breathing on this earth, have our own set of deep-seated issues, broken relationships, personal wounds. We also have our own joys, triumphs, successes, talents, principles, and moments of love, excitement, laughter, and contentment each day, too. And while yes, a well-adjusted attitude can get you far, tangible change comes from altering a system and building a better understanding in communities. It starts with dissecting these tropes and NOT PERPETUATING STEREOTYPES. That is where this so called activism lies.

7. “I want to live in a world where a kid…is not one bit surprised that his new teacher is a wheelchair user.”:This final point pretty much speaks for itself. What I want to highlight here, at last, is the rhetoric. Notice how Stella uses the term “wheelchair user” rather than the ever popular phrase, “in a wheelchair.” Through this she implies that the person is not defined primarily by mobility equipment or physical capabilities.Moreover, please note, the individual to whom you refer is liberated by their mobility devices. They actually use them to get from place to place, to thrive,to live.When one incorrectly states “in a wheelchair”she or he is under the presumption that that person istrapped by the device they just happen to use.Looking at this through Stella’s lens, however, this language is degrading. It is also labeling a person into a small box, when in fact our disability is far more complex than that. I’ve come to realize, too, how this language is another form of lionization. Please don’t assume a person exceptional merely because of what they use. Get to know said person first.Thenassess.